I have made an executive decision to have delusions of grandeur, if delusions they be. I went off my game, spirituality-wise and life-wise, back in 1998 when the Great Evil came to my life, and I’ve noticed that the entire world has been veering towards catastrophe ever since.
I apologize for not realizing sooner that I held the fate of an entire planet in my hands, but rational thinking compelled me to consider other possibilities.
We no longer have time for rational solutions. The time left to save the world from itself is mere months. I want you all to know that I’m back on the job and for one such as me, it’s never too late. Daily rituals for the enlightenment of those who can be enlightened in their current lifetime, and the speedy advancement to their next lifetime of those who cannot, commence today.
(The truth be told, I preferred a model of the universe where people weren’t sure if I was going to help save the world or destroy it, but things have gone so far out of balance that I have to pick the good guys for now.)